Why do I write? “Fish gotta swim, birds gotta fly…” Writing takes me into a space of deep attention that others find through prayer and meditation. When I write, I discover what feels true about myself and my world. My intellect can spin a lot of convincing theories, but I can’t fake it in a story or a poem. When my dramatization of an idea sounds insincere or psychologically implausible, I know that either I don’t actually believe this, or I need a time-out from writing so I can heal my wounded thoughts and reconnect to the divine Source of love. As a Christian writing teacher once told me, “Problems with your novel are really problems with your soul.” The question “Why do I write?” only arises when I lose my nerve about coming to grips with vulnerability, suffering, and change—which can’t be avoided, whether one writes or not! Besides, sometimes I get paid.

A poet since childhood, winning prizes since my teens, I started seriously writing fiction in my 30s to develop more empathy for people whose life paths were different from mine. This catalyzed my decade-long transformation from conservative Christian blogger to gay rights activist, erotic fiction writer, and student of Tarot. Or, to quote a recent Amherst Cinema brochure: “Thus begins an aimless journey toward bizarre ends.” But my soul feels healthier than ever.

http://www.jendireiter.com/

 

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